OTHER LUTHER BLISSETT WEBSITES |
ANALECTA 1997 | |
...We have to get beyond the bounds of information, into a realm where it overturns and shatters into pieces... détourner and go deep into paranoia, push their game up to an extreme paradox, sell distorted stories off to the press bounty-killers... Turn the very logic of the system into our war strategy: media homoeopathy (L.B., July 3rd, 1996).
Later Blissett wrote a book on the inquisitorial spectacle of pedophilia. It's published by Castelvecchi and titled Lasciate che i bimbi: 'Pedofilia', pretesto per la caccia alle streghe[Let The Children...:'Pedophilia' as a Pretext for Witch Hunt]. Those who read Italian can read/download the book at either of the following URLs:
On January 4th 1997, Saturday, I phoned the Roman office of the ANSA, a major press agency:
LB - Hello, this is Aldo Curiotto. As the official spokesman of Comunita Incontro, I feel bound to disavow the latest news on the arrest of don Pierino Gelmini. The Carabinieri did NOT arrest him, they are just interrogating him. Don Gelmini has NOT YET been charged with a traffic of child-abuse videos.
ANSA - ...Sorry? We havent received any press release about the arrest!
LB - I just told you it isnt an arrest. Theyre temporarily detaining him in custody!
ANSA - Thats quite strange, nobody informed us! What charge have you mentioned? Child abuse???
LB - Don Gelmini is supposed to have produced paedophiliac porn movies in Thailand, but theres NO charge, theyre still examining him. Theyre simply holding him for the time being.
ANSA - O boy! [turning to his colleagues] Hey! The Carabinieri held don Gelmini! [background voices: What?] Yes, theyre questioning him about a traffic of pedophiliac videos! [speaking to me:] Do you want to declare something else?
LB - Please, keep in mind that Ive called to d-i-s-a-v-o-w! Theres no proof of a connection between don Gelmini and the Cambodian man arrested in Fiumicino.
ANSA - [to the colleagues] Christ! A connection with that Cambodian guy! [Speaking to me:] Thank you, Mr. Curiotto. Please give us your phone number, this is going to cause a great stir, we need to keep in touch with you!
LB - Yes, of course. The number of the press office is 3725580. Thats all for now. Please, show respect for the work of don Gelmini. Bye.
I gave them the real number of Comunita Incontro in Rome. Likewise, Aldo Curiotto is the real name of their press agent. I perfectly knew that they were going to call back that number. The real Curiotto would have denied the whole story. But I suspected that my story was *novel*, a perfect matter for exploitation (South-Eastern Asia, child abuse, the secret life of a notorious benefactor who also happened to be a priest...). Such an odd attempt at slandering don Gelmini deserved to be covered anyway.
The following day, all the newspapers reported the story under headlines such as:
Slandered In Revenge?
The Priest: I Got Used To Attacks
(LAvvenire, January 5th, 1997)
An attack on the good name of don Pierino Gelmini has been launched by someone who pretended to be the press agent of Comunita Incontro and spread delirious nonsense using my name [...] My duty is to protect both my activity as a press agent and don Gelminis reputation.
Some columnists noticed that the child abuse phenomenon had been so overexposed in the media that it had become a farce, a subject for gratuitous exploitation, hoax and calumny. Better late then never. It is surely a coincidence, yet the national media has stopped raising hell on paedophilia for nearly two weeks. As to me, although Curiotto and Gelmini couldnt sue a collective phantom, I remained anonymous out there, in the big anywhere.
Now imagine that the police, alerted by my prank, interrogate don Gelmini for real about his business in Thailand...
January 16th, 1997